Could I really be turning 51 in 34 minutes?? How in the world did I get here? In my mind, I'm still 18 but the body feels like 103. That's what happens when you survive cancer...they almost kill you to save you and you never ever feel the same....that's ok though, believe me! I'll take whatever God's willing to give me to be here with my sweet husband.
Back to the birthday....51? WTH?? I'm sliding toward 60! Me 60...it just doesn't make sense. I'm young!!! I'm not a fossil!!! Yet, my daughter takes great joy in reminding me how old I'm getting. At 5:00 AM, she will be calling me and singing Happy Birthday. Of course, it will be 6AM at her house but who's counting! I love it....her Dad and I do the same to her on her birthday...it's just a tradition in my family....Now, If I called my son and sang Happy Birthday to him, he would drive to my house and probably check to see if I've lost my mind. He hates that kind of thing and he's 28 so I guess I understand. Now old Hank was born mad....pinky swear....the boy just has that kind of personality. He's ill tempered ALL THE TIME. When I had cancer, he would not come into the house. He would stand outside my window and talk to me on the beep beep. He just doesn't react the way Brynn, her Dad and I do. But I love him to pieces...I just have to say it differently.
Back to the birthday...WTH?? I mean really! I'm mighty proud to have made it this far, especially after the big C but I don't want to age anymore. I want to stay here. I love where I am in my life right now. I'm stronger, happier and tougher than I've ever been and it's the age! You get to a certain point in your maturity where you just don't take anymore crap from people. Brynn says I have the evil eye now....as she says....I've seen you slice someone up with a look. In my line of work, that's a pretty cool talent to have.
Down to 25 minutes...I'm off to bed so I can get up tomorrow and enjoy the start of another blessed year from God....he's cut me 5 more years than I thought I had, so who's complaining!!
I'm a Southern Belle, a wife, a mother, a daughter, a sister and now a breast cancer survivor just loving and living life to the fullest and knowing every day is a gift from my most precious Father. Married to my BFF and love of my life. If I ever wonder if God loves me, I just have to look at "the boy" and know He does. I couldn't be with a more perfect mate...well not perfect....he can drive me nuts....but I wouldn't trade him for the world.
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