It's my birthday and I'm old as hell

Could I really be turning 51 in 34 minutes?? How in the world did I get here? In my mind, I'm still 18 but the body feels like 103. That's what happens when you survive cancer...they almost kill you to save you and you never ever feel the same....that's ok though, believe me! I'll take whatever God's willing to give me to be here with my sweet husband.

Back to the birthday....51? WTH?? I'm sliding toward 60! Me 60...it just doesn't make sense. I'm young!!! I'm not a fossil!!! Yet, my daughter takes great joy in reminding me how old I'm getting. At 5:00 AM, she will be calling me and singing Happy Birthday. Of course, it will be 6AM at her house but who's counting! I love it....her Dad and I do the same to her on her birthday...it's just a tradition in my family....Now, If I called my son and sang Happy Birthday to him, he would drive to my house and probably check to see if I've lost my mind. He hates that kind of thing and he's 28 so I guess I understand. Now old Hank was born mad....pinky swear....the boy just has that kind of personality. He's ill tempered ALL THE TIME. When I had cancer, he would not come into the house. He would stand outside my window and talk to me on the beep beep. He just doesn't react the way Brynn, her Dad and I do. But I love him to pieces...I just have to say it differently.

Back to the birthday...WTH?? I mean really! I'm mighty proud to have made it this far, especially after the big C but I don't want to age anymore. I want to stay here. I love where I am in my life right now. I'm stronger, happier and tougher than I've ever been and it's the age! You get to a certain point in your maturity where you just don't take anymore crap from people. Brynn says I have the evil eye now....as she says....I've seen you slice someone up with a look. In my line of work, that's a pretty cool talent to have.

Down to 25 minutes...I'm off to bed so I can get up tomorrow and enjoy the start of another blessed year from God....he's cut me 5 more years than I thought I had, so who's complaining!!

Kill me now and shoot me later

That's right...I want to die before the flu kills me....three days of this mess and I am at the end of my rope...someone should write a book about why the flu happens to good people...I'm good...I've had cancer...I shouldn't have to get the flu...it should be a law...oh well...I've bullied the computer long enough....I'm going back to sleep

Sunday night countdown

I love Sundays, but around 7PM I starting remembering that I have to work the next day...that sucks...although I do love the people I work with so that does help somewhat....Hope you all have a blessed week...all 0 of my fans!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! LOL

Football Saturdays

I love football in the South...there is nothing better this time of year and while Donnie and I go to lots of games....I think the best games are ones spent at home with him watching the game, pigging out on junk and spending time with each other. The last four years, we've been going to lots of FSU games because our niece, Taylor, was a coed cheerleader. We had the most fun going to the games with Becky and Tommy, chillin out and watching her having the time of her life, doing something she loves....such a cool kid.

Now we're back in Alabama every Saturday, supporting Troy and Alabama. Donnie graduated from Alabama so life has to stop when they are playing. I have a secret to tell about Alabama football but I can't yet...I've been sworn to secrecy!!

My husband decided to throw me under the bus this morning...as if life hasn't been kicking me in the teeth lately!! We own a tent business and also rent tables and chairs. This is a side business but this time of year is pretty hectic. He puts up every tent we own. So today, UAB rents a huge one from him and also 35 tables. He decides that we must put table cloths on each 8 ft. table. He drops me off and says here's some tape...don't forget to tape them down....now, the wind is blowing a cool 35 miles per hour and I'm standing there with 35 tablecloths, a roll of tape, scissors and a really pissed off attitude. For those of you who know me, I'll rather cut off my nose to spite my face than give in so the next 2 HOURS I am fighting wind, paper, tape and misting rain. When I got through, I could have killed him and no jury in the State of Alabama would have convicted me....NONE.

He needs to be real careful because when he wakes up in the morning he may have packing tape on some areas that are really going to upset him....just sayin

Wynny and Weezy and what not to do at Pet Smart

Banned from Pet Smart....for life!
Traveling with 2 wiener dogs that weigh 42 pounds between them is not unlike peeling your fingernails off with a rusty knife. Donnie and I decided to go to Atlanta to see Brynn and thought it would be fun to take the dogs. We left a 5AM so we had to wait until we got to Atlanta to go to Pet Smart to get them collars that fit. They're fat...what can I say. Weezy (my little baby) also has a head smaller than her neck so just a regular collar is out. I also don't like regular collars because they choke. So after getting lost, which makes Donnie's voice go up 9 octaves, we find one. He's in a hurry and somewhat ill from riding in the car with them....these dogs fart ALOT....must have been the boil peanuts I fed them the night before.

Anyway, so we go into to Pet Smart and are stopped (because they aren't on a leash) and are given a blue leash to loop around their necks....first mistake. Now Weezy is like those goats that fall over and pretend they are dead....that's exactly what she did when we walked in....I had to pick her up which pull 14 muscles in my back. Meanwhile, Wynny (the bitch) is barking at EVERYTHING!! This includes cats, ferrets, other dogs, no matter what size and small black children. I'm sure these children will be in therapy for the rest of their lives after seeing their lives flash before their eyes through the fangs of a nasty tempered wiener dog.

We hustle over to the harness section...me dragging Weezy like a dust mop and Donnie trying to cover Wynny's mouth so no one dies. We get there and just start snatching down harnesses. Weezy faints again and Wynny breaks loose and goes for the small child SCREAMING at the end of the aisle. We finally just drop to the floor and put them in our laps. I've noticed that employees are walking by checking to see if their is a lion loose in the store and whispering to each other. We each have a harness and neither one of us can figure out how to put the stupid thing on and even if it's big enough. Weezy now weighs 80 pounds because she's DEAD WEIGHT. I roll her off my lap onto the floor and she starts SCREAMING like a little girl....I swear the dog sounded human. This brings another rush of employees to see what we are killing when Wynny once again tries to kill ANYTHING that is breathing. Of course, I wanted Weezy to have a pink collar so when I finally got it on she just slumped to the floor and would not move...not even her eyes. Donnie has a red one on Wynny and we decide, what the hell, let's just get out of there. He runs to the register and starts paying for the collars...mind you he has pulled the tags off because neither one of us is going to take those things off. I'm sitting on the floor near the entrance trying to keep Wynny from being arrested when this man walks over and tells me that we probably don't need to bring our dogs back in the store because they just aren't well behaved....so I let Wynny go....and that's why we won't be going back to Pet Smart.

Fridays are my cocaine

Because I know what's coming.....FOOTBALL, being home with the boy, the pups, watching movies, reading, seeing friends and the list goes on and on! No one is going to call me on the phone and WANT something. The hardest thing I will do this weekend is putting those crazy Phi Mus on a bus to date party and if one, just one of them shows up drunk, then it's all the way live....I'm kinda hoping one of the pledges will be dumb enough, but I may have to find my jollies somewhere else. I always love to see them dressed up and showing off with their dates...of course the dates are animals...they just don't seem to get the fact that when they are my age, they won't remember who they dated that first year and they sure won't have kept in touch over the years. Now their sisters...they will always know what they're doing and will be involved in their lives...just can't get it across to a few of them that boys don't matter.

Last year when I took over as adviser, they went to a date party at the Montgomery Zoo...and I bet you can't guess what happened??? Yep, one of the boys tried to climb the fence into the lion cage. I kinda wish he had made it...I've never seen an idiot mauled by a lion...but I digress. This year they are going 50 miles away to a place that I don't really know anyone. That's a blessing. I just hope they are safe and take care of each other. Of course, if they throw up they get fined $100...I'm telling ya, I throw up, I'm going to tape my mouth shut before I give up that kind of money! Somebody always does though and then they get mad and feel like they are getting picked on. You kinda are...you got drunk and showed your butt and now we're rich!

Well, off I go to the"Hill" to put my girls on a bus....pray they don't get arrested cause I'm not going to get them out!

Suprise...2 days in a row

Pick yourselves off the floor all 0 of you who read this blog....two days in a row! Still in Atlanta and getting ready to go back to the reality of my life. Mom survived without me this weekend and I got some much needed rest. If you don't count the pups barking a pen full of rabbits CONSTANTLY...I rested. Now for the 4 hour ride home. Most people think that's a normal ride but I live in Mayberry and anywhere I want to go in Troy takes 10 minutes TOPS! The way I drive usually much shorter.

We did go to an amazing church this morning. Praise band and everyone had on jeans...my kind of church. Being Baptist I'm not use to such sacrilege but I loved it and I'm sure I'll refer back often this week to the message. I love my church but gosh it's stuffy...if some of the older people in my church had seen what I saw...they'd be on life support at the Edge of Death (our small town hospital).

So I'm off to return to the land of responsibility....if anyone is reading...hope your week rocks!

Fat dogs